Fiction: Iowan Work Ethic

This is one of my #FridayFlash fiction stories. Each Friday, members of the #FridayFlash group on Twitter write fictional stories of 1,000 words or less and share them. Join in the fun by clicking on the #FridayFlash banner on my sidebar!

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Beulah bolted through the back pasture as fast as her nine-year-old feet could run. She fell to her knees by the pond, choked with pain, the tears streamed down her cheeks. At last, she was far enough away from her family’s farm house, relatives and friends to release her torment. This place was her only refuge to flail her pain at God.

She desperately tried to silence the memories of recent events that plagued her distressed mind. “Stop it!” she cried, her hands covered her ears.

Beulah could hear the terrifying screech of her Mama’s voice that shot through her heart as she awoke in the middle of the night, “Burt, come here! It’s Dean, hurry up… Call the doctor!”  She never heard Mama yell, except when it was time for supper. This was the night in 1932 when her thirteen-year-old brother, Dean, died from complications of an ear infection.

“She moved that boy too soon, shoulda left him downstairs by the stove where it was warm. That woman just doesn’t like anything out of place.” At the funeral, Beulah overheard her uncle talking to his wife.

“Why didn’t you use the poultice?” Accused grandma when she arrived.

Beulah recalled the sounds of gut-wrenching sobbing. It was the first and only time she heard Mama crying.  Beulah was scared and crept up to the attic. But the sound followed her through the floor boards and she stared out the attic window with her arms crossed, barely breathing. When it was time to fix supper, Mama got up and never cried again.

This was the beginning of the most haunting sound of all, the silence that deafened.  The new supper routine was set, Papa looked down at his plate, oldest brother, William, gulped food and left to be with friends, Mama cooked, never sat until everyone was finished. Beulah was lost and looked for respite from the pounding silence.

Papa worked longer hours on the farm. Mama cleaned the house until her hands were raw.  At church, Beulah’s parents became quiet and withdrawn. They darted their eyes away from those that knew of their curse. Beulah surmised from other’s reactions that God was judging them for their negligence.

Over the years, Beulah tried other ways to help the family remove the blot from their good record. For a short time, she behaved cheerfully and became the happy one in the family. She hoped they could forget for a moment. Despite her efforts, Beulah became invisible. Pain was already wrapped around each family member as an invisible shield of insulation.  She learned that emotions had no place in her family’s world.

The memories that entered Beulah’s nine-year-old body continued to circulate through her blood and through the blood of her family like a virus for many years. It transmuted into a new form of numbing thoughts they used to earn redemption and dull the pain.

“Gathered the eggs…good harvest of corn this year…invited the neighbors over…wrote letters to family…attended church service…preserved strawberries on Saturday.”

The only words spoken to each other concerned chores, guests for dinner, and events at church. Mama recorded what they accomplished each day in her diary. There were no feelings, ideas, hopes or dreams written in the entries, only good deeds.  It was the proof that they were working hard to earn their righteousness and it gave her hope for a reprieve from guilt.

William was a good boy, married a local woman, worked for the Farm Bureau, and was very successful.  Beulah eloped with a wild man who brought grief to them all. But neither could change the buried pain in the family. Beulah concluded she was guilty of wrong-doing.  She engaged her daily chores in another attempt to redeem herself, this time for the sin of marrying the wrong man and failing to help her family.

Through their lifetimes, Beulah and her mama continued to do their chores, be good to others and record it in their diaries. Surely they have now earned a place in heaven where they could find everlasting peace.


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52 responses to “Fiction: Iowan Work Ethic”

  1. Wow, you can almost see the stark cornfields in the background of this one. What a lot of pain you portray in just a few words! Family histories are so interesting, especially the parts that you don’t ever hear.

    CD

    1. Thanks Cecilia, I am also fascinated with family history, what gets passed on, what doesn’t and how changes occur. Your right, so much unsaid and never shared!!

  2. Heartbreaking, just heartbreaking. This earning of redemption and not being worthy of happiness–haunts so much of our culture still, perhaps even all (albeit not in exactly the same form). Love the theme–it’s one dear to me. My dissertation deals with a form of it (working through the concept of punishment). I like the third person here–distance while treating intense emotion–perfect for the theme of the story.

    1. Melisa, thanks so much for your comments. Your dissertation sounds very interesting! I am curious to know what major you are that would let you do a dissertation of that nature? Psych? Soc?

  3. I love this story! Hooked me in right away. I’m not an editor or critiqu-er, but love writing, and this piece was really worth the read. Can’t wait to come back and visit again! ~Amy

    1. Thanks Amy! I love getting the feedback from new visitors! I’m so glad you will be stopping by again!

  4. Loved your story. Touching, tender, infinitely sad, well-written, the whole package.

    1. Thanks Cathy, I’m glad you liked it!

  5. Anne – I love it – i hope we get to see the revision as well! When i have a few minutes to rub together i am embarking on some narrative nonfiction sort of along these same lines. This is very well done and your descriptions are very vivid. I’d love to see more pieces like this that get at the emotion – you do it very well!

    1. Hi PJ, thanks for comments! I was debating about nonfiction with this stuff also. It is based on factual events, but I didn’t have enough info. I plan to do several slices of life back in the Iowa farm heydays of the 1920-50s. I would like to see yours too.

  6. G.P. Ching

    This is such a deep work, taping a hidden nerve, I think, of many american families. Those that for whatever reason, live a life on automatic, never getting over what tragedies befall them. Really well written. Excellent, excellent work.

    1. Thanks Genevieve, for your comments and feedback. It is amazing to realize how much this kind of behavior still exists today.

  7. Sad story. What a slice of life indeed. Nicely done.

    1. Thanks for coming by to read, and thanks for comments – much appreciated!!

  8. My favorite parts are the first paragraph and up in the attic. You paint a strong picture of a girl’s pain.

    1. Hi Mark, thanks for your comments – glad you liked those moments of the girl by herself, dealing with the situation

  9. Oh bravo Anne! I am so glad I came for the encore performance. You have done a wonderful job in paring this right back. It reads beautifully now – it’s such an impressive story. Well done, well done!

    1. Thanks so much Lily, I’m glad you swooped in first and snapped me out of a trance to see what needed to be changed – it was very helpful!

  10. Sorry if that was confusing. I switched between spoken word and diary entry. I meant for the quotes to be spoken, then recorded later.

    Thanks Kim.

  11. Beautifully done, Anne. I don’t think I could add anything but support the positive feedback of others. One suggestion: move the mention of the diary before the entry for clarity purpose. It seems now that the entry is made up of spoken words (which may be your intent?). Just a minor critique. Nice work.

  12. no doubt Lutherans, Scandinavians or both. this story ring so true of that stoic lot…

    1. Oh yes, and this family lived in the same farm communities with the Lutherans and Scandinavians – the Congregationals – the Germans, the English. The puritan ethic abounded.

  13. This was different than what I became used to reading here, but great nonetheless.
    Loved all the emotion and feeling in this flash, you’ve captured the loss of a family and their own way of grief wonderfully!

    1. Thanks Estrella, I know it was about time to share something else besides my goofy mafia family.

  14. Bursting with beautiful turns of phrase. I especially liked: “the most haunting sound of all, the silence that deafened” and the idea of memories circulating in the bloodstream.

    1. David, thanks for your comments.

  15. You captured the sorrow and repentance of this family quite well. Nicely done!

  16. A brave departure, Anne. And one that works. This line was a wonderful prefiguring of the Christian guilt, pennance and retribution that is the subject of this lovely, sad piece:
    “But the sound followed her through the floor *boards* and she stared out the attic window with her arms *crossed*, barely breathing.”
    Wonderful writing, very well done.
    Simon.

    1. Whoa, you are very observant, I hadn’t made the connection – but I will take it.

      Thanks Simon!

  17. Anne, This story is so typical of families everywhere. There may not be the death of a child to contend with, but there is always something.

    You captured a very real family dynamic and I think it’s a story that anyone or everyone can relate to in some sense.

    Sad but wonderful writing, Anne.

    Have a great weekend,
    Cynthia

    1. Thanks so much, Cynthia. You are kind to stop by so many FridayFlash stories!

      You also have a great weekend – the thaw is coming!

  18. Wow – sad and oh so touching.
    Love how she married a wild man that broke everyone’s heart, how could she do otherwise?!

    1. Thanks Maria, I believe that those in the family that actually break the rules are the ones trying harder to find a better way, even if it doesn’t always work.

  19. Marvelously written – what a terrible, painful blow to the family. How sad that it echoes down through one generation after the next.

    1. Tony,

      Thanks for your comments! It is amazing how much passes down in families without conscious awareness, it just is the way things are.

  20. Wow, Anne. You really pulled out all the stops this week. Really well written story, and such depth. Beautiful job.

    1. Thanks Laurita, your comments and support are very much appreciated!

  21. As others have said Anne, this is very different for you, and I like it. You should do this more often. The story obviously comes from your heart, and how wonderful that you have your grandmother’s diaries, sad as they may be. I’d love to have that kind of family history. Alas, all we have are guarded, and most often censored, “passings-along”, (if it’s not a word then I just made one up). 🙂

    This story resonates with me greatly – I have an aunt whose first son died at 7 years old due to some disease that no one in the family can, (or will), name. I was just a baby then so I never knew him, but you captured the relations of their family perfectly here. Obviously these type things are universal.

    Very well-told!

    1. Thanks for your comments, Deanna. I do have several things from my family but the stories were always told in about 1-2 sentences, as though they just reported the events. My mom said, “my brother died from an ear infection, Mother was never the same after that.” I was alway left to fill in the blanks from what I saw in photos and read from their diaries. When I asked questions I got very vague responses.

      I can relate to that censored stuff – illnesses were not talked about. My other grandmother was someone who never uttered, “cancer.” They all seemed to have the belief that if you talked about it, it might happen to someone else they loved.

  22. When mend and make do simply won’t do. Touching, I felt her grief and her guilt all the way.

    Fantastic.

    Marc

    1. Thanks Marc, I was hoping the emotion would come through.

  23. Great flash Anne – really well crafted!
    Interesting story and tight neat writing.

    1. Thanks Michelle, glad to hear my re-writes worked to tighten it up!

  24. Such a sad tale of a family desolate by the pain of losing a child, and imprisoned by the guilt.

    Living a life of penance is the premise here, and you’ve designed a picture with your words of what that could look like.

    Yes, different from your other stories, but just as intriguing!

    1. Marisa,

      I’m glad you liked my departure. But I guess I am still writing about dysfunctional families. People find their way through pain in so many ways when they don’t have the resources to do it in a healthy way. Penance is such a deep archetypal process in our psyche.

  25. Anne –

    Even though it’s a sad tale, well done! I can relate to the pain and sorrow within this family. I’m used to reading some quick, scary #ff stories and this was a great break from the normal for me. Again, well done – and I hope to see more of this kind of emotion.

    Jim

    1. Jim,

      I’m glad you stopped by and liked my story – yes, it is quite different in style, tone and emotion. It is based on real life events from my family. I only know a few sketchy details, so had to make up in the rest. I have diaries from my grandmother that read just like these – years and years of them – very odd.

  26. Wow, Anne. This seems to me like the inside workings of so many families. You’ve crafted the pain and working for redemption so well.

    1. Thanks Laura, even though you read the messy version, I’m glad you liked it.

  27. Hi Anne! What a completely different fiction you’ve weaved for us this week, although about another dysfunctional family. What a very sad tale. I often wonder what it would be like to lose a child and I think you’ve really captured the destruction of familial relationships.

    A little bit of critique (skip this part if you’re not interested)? Something I’ve been looking at in my own writing is tightening things up and deleting redundant words. You’ve also got a fair bit of repetition of ideas. You could strip this back a bit further so the stark pain would be matched by stark writing. Also, something else I’ve been really working on is getting the tenses right. The tense within sentences skips around a bit in some of your paragraphs, which made me focus on the grammar rather than the story – a little annoying as I was so engrossed in the story – I didn’t want anything to bump me out of it!

    Anyway, take all that with a grain of salt. I thought this was a very good story. Well done.

    1. Thanks Lily,

      I have tightened it up quite a bit since you read it and changed the tenses. Very helpful – parts of it were a mess & I didn’t see it.

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