Living With Live Wires

First, try to identify and stop the trigger when at all possible.  When children are experiencing a spill-over tantrum they often cannot stop themselves.  They need us to help them gain control and calm down.

Mary Sheedy Kurchinka (2006), in Raising Your Spirited Child, has several suggestions to help parents deal with spill-over tantrums:

Stop the Flood

Stay With or Near Your Child

Touch Your Child

Try Distraction

Give Your Child Space

Encourage Your Child to Move

I have personally tried all these techniques before reading this book out of instinct.  I spend a lot of time making sure that our schedule is not overbooked with overstimulated events.  That usually works, but it takes a lot of vigilance.  I consider staying with your child and touching your child very important, especially for younger children.  As they get older, they may want some space.  My son does need to move around to work out the tension and overstimulation at times.  It is like getting the fire out of the body.

Overall, keep a list of options in your mind to try with your child to see what works best to control their environment and what is effective to calm and soothe them.

See part 3 of this series for more ideas on how to deal with spill-over tantrums.

For more detailed instructions and for much more on how to deal with spirited children, get the book by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, Raising Your Spirited Child, .